The Galley

It is all about temptation! When you can't do stuff you want it even more. FEED ME CHOCOLATE!!!!!!!!

After my self-imposed, masochistic alcohol ban and my very necessry drug's ban, the only thing left to consume is food, and even then you are told that too much of this or that is bad for you and the child.
I wander into the kitchen, idly open the fridge expecting something amazing to be lying in wait, and lo and behold, surprise surprise, there is nothing in there other than a folorn bit of wilted dill and an petrified sausage. Why? Because I get breathless just going up the stairs to use the loo, let alone hauling my arse to Tesco. Even if I got there I couldn't carry much, coz guess what? You aren't allowed to lift anything either - AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHH!!!!!!

The galley slave is awakening in me. Galley as in kitchen, you understand, and galley slave in terms of being crippled by the sense of dread of eventually being trapped in there for months sterilizing and Moulinexing everything and hiding half-empty bottles of cooking brandy under the sink.

I have a feeling I'll be less Women's Institute Housewife of the Year and more Mama-Doll-Tramp of the Valley on benzos, vallies and pethidine, belting out show tunes in a pink lacy ballgown three sizes too small, in her ugly brown trailer, and the five mungrel muts tied up outside joining the chorus of 'Smile though your Heart is Breaking'!!!!........we'll see. I might start up my own WI, The Mother's Association for the Narcotic-filled, Incompitent Aggravated CuntS (MANIACS)!!
Praise be to the Gaya for The Big Orange One (BOO)! He'll save me...I hope...from any real harm. He appears unflustered thus far. Probably out-live me at the rate my blood pressure is going!

Restaurant recommendation: Little Bay, Belsize Road (Kilburn end) - can't go wrong - they don't take cards but who cares - its cheap!!! The food seriously rocks and, please note pregnant ladies and hungry monkeys, they aren't stingey on the portions.

Mental Note I: Must ensure BOO is fully trained in the kitchen. He promises he knows how to cook. I have seen evidence of this in the form of a very excellent stake and so it all looks promising.

Mental Note (MN) II: Must stop giving everything acronyms and reducing things to just their initials! It is a stupid thing to do and seemed a good idea at the time but now its getting in the way. I feel like Seinfeld. The neurosis is heightening - this is bad.

Must skulk off to work kitchen now and forage before lecture on Marxism vs capitalist consumerism.........mmmm...donuts!